feminism, or, simply loving yourself

wow. some things seem so clear, that is, until you become educated on how things really are. sure you'll think about things, but until you apply them to your life you will never start to begin to see just exactly how close to home it is and how it rings true in your EVERYDAY life. Take this excerpt from Victoria Woodhull's The Elixer of Life: or, Why Do We Die? This woman has already proved to me to be strong in what she has done and what she has said. She lived from 1838-1927, she was a suffragist, first woman to run for president, free-love advocate, first woman stockbroker on Wall Street, and an editor. Here she is commenting on the unjust and unfair equalities of women in relation to sexual pleasure.

"I need not explain to any woman the effects of unconsummated intercourse, though she may attempt to deceive herself about it; but every man needs to have it thundered in his ears until he wakes to the fact that he is not the only party to the act, and that the other party demands a return for all that he receives; demands that he shall not be enriched at her expense; demands that he shall not, wither from ignorance or selfish desire, carry her impulse forward on its mission only to cast it backward with the mission unfulfilled, to prostrate the impelling power and to breed nervous debility or irritability and sexual demoralization, and to sow the seeds of disease broadcast among humanity."

she goes on to say:

"It is a fact terrible to contemplate, yet it is nevertheless true, and ought to be pressed upon the world for recognition: that fully one-half of all women seldom or never experience any pleasure whatever in the sexual act."

This is not just something that happened in the past, and was quite a forward way of expression for that time especially. This needs to be recognized as truth, and not just the kind of truth that only happens to some people, but truth that happens to ALL women. The oppression of women when it comes to sex and sexuality has been happening for years and we are so conditioned to think that it is the norm. The fact that there is no thought to what the woman wants or that it may be needed for her pleasure has become a problem that forces women to being take advantage of, and not allowed rights when it comes to sexuality. Man has in the past has written and rewritten science to include the "fact" that the clitoris does not exist, or that it does not stimulate pleasure, so that there could not be any reason for women to need any form of pleasure for themselves when it comes to sex. It is here where the men have used women over and over again as their sources of pleasure and have not given consideration to what the women need. Without equality in the bedroom, women are not seen as equals outside of the bedroom. This exploitation of women is what drives us to using our bodies as a means to move up in society, get what we want, etc. put more clearly, women have been forced into prostitution.
Emma Goldman (1869-1940), was a Russian anarchist who wrote and lectured extensively on women's rights, birth control, free speech, and union organizing. In her essay The Traffic of Women, she explains the confines of our sex and how we are forced to use it in our society.

"Nowhere is a woman treated according to the merit of her work, but rather as a sex. It is therefore almost inevitable that she should pay for her right to exist, to keep a position in whatever line, with sex favors. Thus it is merely a question of degree whether she sells herself to one man, in or out of marriage, or to many men. Whether our reformers admit it or not, the economic and social inferiority of woman is responsible for prostitution."

This got me thinking even more. Growing up, prostitutes were thought of as sinners, people who only wear trashy clothing and clear heels while parading in front of the motel in the sketchy neighborhoods, and were mysteriously never seen in real life, but in movies and explicit videos.With this new bit of information, it comes to my attention that i am surrounded by prostitutes. This new reality shakes my sense of previous knowledge and challenges me to think of my own life. There is something interesting about the fact that women have to "pay" for their rights by selling themselves in such a demoralizing way.

...not too much more to say about it right now, im getting a bit tired and have yet to start my homework, oops! let me just leave you with this question to ponder in relation to what you have just heard: is marriage a form of legalized prostitution?

goodnight athens