new me

summer, the time of year where we are carefree and where it seems to be the most opportune time for us to be us, right? im beginning to think that some things are not always what they seem, what we want is not always what is best for us, and that things do not always work out the way that we want them to. Now, im not just beginning to think this, i have thought it for most of my life, but i wish that i was this ignorant and innocent child just discovering the let downs of every day life. I have changed this summer, and have become someone i never thought i could be, or for that matter, enjoy being. I am single. and i am enjoying it. This is not to say that if the right guy came along, i would not be the first to strike up the match and start offering to do his laundry. I, for the first time since i turned 16, am single and unlike before, am getting accustomed to it and am enjoying it. Some things have changed though. Going into this summer i felt as if i had the whole world before me and that nothing could go wrong. In the past couple of weeks i have been faced with many different challenges that have questioned who i am and who i want to be. Everyone is entitled to their own life, so i should be entitled to mine. I am not going to let myself become tired of thinking why how where when about certain people when i am almost certain they are not thinking the same, that is unfair to me. and i am not going to just stand there and listen to people tell me what i should or should not be doing. I try to please everybody, i give to much of myself, and i end up getting hurt. Well i am going to try things in a different way from now on. Here's to a new me and a new start on my life, my future relationships whenever and wherever they may come, and my current friendships becoming stronger than they already are.

goodnight you